Ask August

[sophist]

it is soooo strong that birdman had to double post!  :wink:

but seriously,the only i endorse is Kathy Lee Gifford's clothing line.
a

ROTFL 

[birdman]

 :oops:
Caught that huh? You are quick....

[August]

cat-like.....
rrrrrmmeeeoaaaaawwwwwwww.......

a

[August]

More importantly, what ever happened to joey (from blossom)?
WOAH!

funny you should ask!
my friends from the next town over in Amityville, NY and I worked with JL a few years back!
seriously!
Joey is a fierce rapper!
Amityville is where the Horror House lives.
this is the best song you will ever hear.
listen closely for Joey lawrence.

http://www.sendspace.com/file/ngwyx4

Glad to Help-
August

[VA $l!m]

re: salvia.

the first time i heard of that stuff was on tour in 98 when we stopped at some chick's house in berkeley and her mom gave us a bunch of leaves of it... she said somethin about a native american shaman, and gave us some advice on "how" to use it.
me and my friend bill-- who would later become one of my best friends before he passed away 2 yrs ago, ended up smoking it after the 1st deer creek show at one of the campgrounds in a tent... pretty neat, all i remember though is the weird sound of nitrous tanks poppin off all night.

[Hicks]

Best thread ever!

My question:  How do I go about enjoying third tier jam bands so I'm not as bummed about Phish not coming back this fall?

Great question!
and you hit the nail on the head.there are no "second tier" "jam" "bands".you are either a jamband or a "just added" artist to some organic sounding summer festival.your answer would be to stock up on Abullah Ibrahim albums and reach for the glass four-footer.
now, just one minute.i am going to answer another question at this point whilst continuing to give you a proper answer. you might call this "killing two birds with one stone" but will realize by the end of this post how very inappropriate that phrase is.

(sound of August rustling through the electronic mailbag).......

is pot a gateway drug?

yes.

Glad to Help-
August

now back to your question, ikki.
o.k. so you got the abdullah album and the glass.these are the two most important items for me when i am trying to "block out" and "unremember" horrible truths. the next two are an old casio keyboard and 25X salvia extract.
i like to select the button on the keyboard labeled "sea sounds" and take a big rip.
the thing about "sea sounds" is that each pitch really isnt different but eaither faster or slower in speed.it also takes about hals a second for the sound to register once you push down on the key. i have a blue bean bag chair, but it is not one of the ones that is just round. this one is more like a chair with a back to it.
at this time you should be about a minute into the first song on the album ....Memories entitled Township Sunday. This is usually the time where each sound coming out of the keyboard is actually 1,000 tiny, overlapping boxes shooting out from each key at a speed of "insanely fast". i can really concentrate on these sounds and keep the music from the album on the other side of my brain, although his piano sometimes permeates my thoughts with more scrambling thoughts. i once thought that there was a "bird lady" in my room and her voice were tiny thumbprints. which isnt that strange, aside from the fact that each thumbprint was wearing black leather boots. I choose Abdullah Ibrahim for such rituals. You can throw in something like the disco biscuits or the new monsoon.you should experience similar effects.plus, you are not really "listening".
if someone asks for a review of the new disco biscuits album you can start by saying "it was actually really cool. i really enjoyed the song where the four porcelin dolls were in the steel cage match. i thought the green one was totally gonna take it until i was forced to eat an entire Motorola SLVR cell phone by the undercover NYPD officer. Special Agent Captain Lou."

Glad to Help-
August

:lol: :lol: :lol:

The only time I tried salvia it was kind of creepy.

I communicated with some kind of "beings", but I got scared and they laughed at me, not my best experience!

But if it will help me enjoy UM, I'll give it another shot!

[gimmetela]

 :oops:

posted to the wrong thread.
As far as questions, I have one--why in the f*&k would someone put dookie brown carpet in my living room and kitchen in my rundown (but packed full of love) apartment?

[gimmetela]

and how could I forget,
it's in my bathroom too...makes for great mushroom growing?

[August]

why in the f*&k would someone put dookie brown carpet in my living room and kitchen in my rundown (but packed full of love) apartment?
and how could I forget,
it's in my bathroom too...makes for great mushroom growing?

this is actually a real easy one.
without every seeing your place, i can tell you that it was built way back in the 1950's.
back then, kings and queens still ruled the world.i take it your entrance to your front door is actually a mote, right?
anyway, way back in the 50's there were three things that made kings feel imporatant.
the first was the collection of wives. the second was gluttony and the third was brown carpeting. the first brown carpet was introduced in the 50's and was not even approved before being installed, so chances are, your brown carpet is a prototype of what evntually became mass-produced in the late 50's and is worth a TON of gold.you are fortunate, tela. i have some carpeting in my place, mostly of mauve hue, and most definitely not in my bathroom or kitchen.the only drawback of having brown carpeting in the kitchen is not that it is fire-prone. in fact, it is the exact opposite. these carpets helped to prevent any damage inflicted by flaming arrows or torched cannonballs hurled from catapults.the only drawback was the possibility of losing pieces of, or entire, steaks in them.any wall damage in the kitchen was most likely a result of an angry, gluttonous king. as you may know, there werent any hospitals way back in the 50's.people didnt know about cholesterol or possible side effects from consuming too much sugars.hell, they were still smoking in movies back in medieval times!

brown carpeting in the bathroom is great for missed targets.

if you ever get the urge to replace your carpets (which i strongly recommend you dont)take comfort in the fact that there is a GREAT DEMAND for such items. but if you do, you will have much wealth and power and most likely a hearty chuckle for you will not have to worry ever again where you next buffet is coming from.

Glad to Help-
August

[cleech74]

gimmetela has a mote?  how cool!  Is it filled with gators?  I just have a hill infront of my house.  :-(

[sophist]

If God, Buddha, Zeus, vishnu, and bob dylan played poker together, who would win?

[fauxpaxfauxreal]

If God, Buddha, Zeus, vishnu, and bob dylan played poker together, who would win?

Bob Dylan would win, and brag about it.

At that exact moment the other four would LAUGH HYSTERICALLY.

And then Bob Dylan would exclaim... "Hey, what the hell is so funny?"

Which would cause the other four to just laugh harder.

[August]

that shit was a straight hijack, yo!

:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x

[sophist]

well i have another:
why is the view still on?

[fauxpaxfauxreal]

that shit was a straight hijack, yo!

:x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x :x

I'm sorry August.

To make up for it...I have a question.

How does one make up for a straight threadjack, yo?